To my two fans that read this. I guess I'm just going to talk about blowjobs. To make this world a better place, people should constantly be giving and receiving blowjobs. You don't need money or health because those things fluctuate. What you need is your dick licked and sucked as often as possible. Blow your load wherever you can as well. On the floor, on the knob of your neighbors car door, or even in your mother's chicken noodle soup.
None of this matters so if you happen to receive a blowjob while on the toilet, try blowing your load at the same time as dropping your load. If successful blog about it, then contact the Guinness Book of Records. Handjobs won't work because it won't produce the same effect. Try giving blowjobs too, that will help if you have problems swallowing pills (like me). There is nothing wrong with the taste of sweet treats.
Blowjobs (giving/receiving) will relieve stress and take your mind off things. It's like yoga, only while performing the Flying Scrotum in class you can give someone a blowjob to see if they hold their balance. Then contact the Guinness Book of Records.
No one is going to read this, but I hope to find semen in my desk when I get to work tomorrow. Good job everyone. We can all release!
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Did you feel a draft?
It was Bill Vaughn that once said "Maybe the answer to the Selective Service is to start everyone off in the army and draft them for civilian life as needed." Sure he was referring to the Selective Service particularly, but who is to say this type of action doesn't take place amongst our everyday society? After drafting some ideas there are two that blew my mind.
In the dating world, there are people strategically choose their mates based on similarities and the right characteristics and there are people who simply go with attraction. Either method can be equally successful, but often it's a game of trial and error. Seldom does one arrive at their final draft with his/her first significant other because like everything else, rough drafts will lead to the one true love. The rough drafts or exes that one encounters can build on dating experience and bedroom experience. One discovers likes and dislikes in a lover as well. Some may even consider it a really fun waiting room as the person of their dreams is still getting ready to be with them. In the end, love conquers all but hitting a few golf balls at the driving range, will only help keep a relationship below par.
In some cases, a draft is a decision that takes deep thought and consideration, although in the occupational world, it doesn't always seem that way. Hiring managers for an employer have as much stress in filling a position as the professional candidate does attempting to be offered it. The candidate is like an actor auditioning for a part where a song and dance is necessary to woo the employer. It's assumed that the hiring manager is a nutless prick who doesn't have the courage to just say "no" to the candidate, but honestly, no one ever really knows why they aren't hired. Hiring someone is an investment and drafting the right person is imperative for the long hall.
The word draft may have many technical definitions, but it also brings different meanings to different people. If the candidate or spouse wasn't the first choice, it only means that it was the better choice because the time was taken to make an educated selection. Whether its politics, writing, brewing, athletics, or weather related, without it, this world would be one big prototype.
In the dating world, there are people strategically choose their mates based on similarities and the right characteristics and there are people who simply go with attraction. Either method can be equally successful, but often it's a game of trial and error. Seldom does one arrive at their final draft with his/her first significant other because like everything else, rough drafts will lead to the one true love. The rough drafts or exes that one encounters can build on dating experience and bedroom experience. One discovers likes and dislikes in a lover as well. Some may even consider it a really fun waiting room as the person of their dreams is still getting ready to be with them. In the end, love conquers all but hitting a few golf balls at the driving range, will only help keep a relationship below par.
In some cases, a draft is a decision that takes deep thought and consideration, although in the occupational world, it doesn't always seem that way. Hiring managers for an employer have as much stress in filling a position as the professional candidate does attempting to be offered it. The candidate is like an actor auditioning for a part where a song and dance is necessary to woo the employer. It's assumed that the hiring manager is a nutless prick who doesn't have the courage to just say "no" to the candidate, but honestly, no one ever really knows why they aren't hired. Hiring someone is an investment and drafting the right person is imperative for the long hall.
The word draft may have many technical definitions, but it also brings different meanings to different people. If the candidate or spouse wasn't the first choice, it only means that it was the better choice because the time was taken to make an educated selection. Whether its politics, writing, brewing, athletics, or weather related, without it, this world would be one big prototype.
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